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Deluded Muhamadu, Beyonce is a witch, Bill Cosby and the rest

 

10 conclusions of the week.

 

“It’s called karma and it is pronounced ha ha ha”.

Does the name Kenneth Okonkwo ring a bell?  I am sure it does. You might know him for always playing the role of a prince or an over-aged playboy in a Nollywood films, or selling out his own people for a mere political recognition. But his current disqualification from contesting for Enugu’s governorship election  by APC isn’t one for the cinema.

According to reports,  Kenneth Okonkwo did not purchase the governorship form before the deadline day. Well, he couldn’t  afford it.  He hoped for a waiver. But there was no such thing.  But 22 million is quite an awful amount of money to fork out for a governorship form.

Isn’t it funny how this man couldn’t afford 22million  but could afford to insult his own tribe.  His political career  is Dead on arrival, next please.

 

PVC is useless!

 

Ladies and gentlemen,  everyone, a moment please.  How useless does your PVC look right now?

In recent times ,it has been a feisty political atmosphere in Nigeria with the Osun governorship election grabbing all the headlines. Tongues have definitely been wagging. The election had all the characteristics of Nigeria’s idea of a free and fair election : the cancellation of the first election for a rerun election for some reason known to the gods and INEC  alone,  and the infringement of voters’ right. This just  a glimpse,  a silhouette to the 2019 elections.

There is the belief that the Osun governorship election was just a tussle between two elite parties to install their puppet.  Let’s get this one straight,  we all know that APC rigged the election,  even Adam Oshiomole admitted to it.  But do you mean to tell me that  PDP had  no Plans of rigging this election?  I don’t believe it. It was a case of being out rigged by the ruling party (how the mighty has fallen ).

I wonder how Davido feels these days knowing  he is not as influential  as the thought he was.  Well,  “God Knows  best”.

 

Deluded muhammadu.

For Nigerians living in Nigeria,  it feels like a decade  has passed  since Buhari took over power as the president of Nigeria. But it had only been  three years.  Yes before I forget,  Good morning to everyone who voted for change.  Soyinka I see you!

In a meeting with  Nigerians in diaspora in New York City on the 27th of September 2018 president Buhari gave a response to people  who called him “Baba go slow” saying:

“Some people  call me  ‘Baba go slow’. Those who where going fast, where did they go”

I appreciate his sense of humor, but I don’t  understand  why you are flattering yourself..  I don’t  think he gets it.   He actually thinks he is moving slow? My apologies sir,  you have been moving  backwards since 2015. It a frigging moonwalk! And those who voted for change,  I bet he has changed it for all of you.

 

Everything  is not for everyone  they say,  and in this part of world,  justice clearly isn’t.

It’s no longer news that the minister of communication,  Adebayo Shittu has been disqualified from the 2019 governorship race by the APC for failing to partake in the one year mandatory  National  Youth Service Corps(NYSC).

First of all,  great work by the party  for keeping  to the rule this. This only makes me wish President Buhari was a member of APC, he would have been disqualified from contesting for failing to provide the most basic requiremnt of SSCE.  Wait a minute!

 It isn’t JUSTICE,  It is JUST – US.

American comedian Bill Cosby has been sentenced to 3 to 10 years in prison after being found guilty of sexual assault of adrea Constand.  Constand accused Cosby  of drugging her and sexually assaulting her in his his home in 2004 which Cosby admitted  to.  My  problem  is  this,  why wait  that long to come out,  what  happened to that hush money?  The interesting  part is that  allegation  opened  the floodgate for 60  more accusers. SIXTY!

One problem with Cosby’s conviction  is that  among all (white) who committed  similar  crime, Cosby is the only one going  to jail. Shefeeq Sheikh,  a former Texas doctor who raped his sedated patient has no prison time.  Carolyn  Bryant  Donham , a white woman who falsely testified  against  Emmett Till (a black teen) in 1955 which lead  to his death. But still no prison sentence, she walks free even after admitting the truth  in 2017. And the almighty Donald Trump is still the president of America.

In response to Cosby”s sentence,  Amber Rose  tweeted :

“f**k the fact that he’s old and f**k the fact that he was on T.V

He is a sexual predator so you are gonna sit there and tell me all these women are lying? ”

 

But f**k the fact he’s black, he’ll be a free man.

 

Abominations are extinct in Africa.

Sabrina Nkosi,  a female KwaZulu – Natal teen has gathered  more attention than required  over the past few days.  Wrong  guess. It’s not about he looks.  Who would have known that she was a man? Sabrina announced through her social media platform  that she was born a boy but transformed to a girl. The big word there is transgender,  and she or he is only a teenager.  Great parenting skills from her parents and a special shout-out to Caitlyn Jenner  who she claims inspired her.  No tongue in the cheek.

 

Beyonce is a witch!

First it was Illuminati and now it is witchcraft. Why didn’t you  say so?  Listen up people,  Beyonce is the newest witch in town.

Beyonce’s  former drummer Kimberly Thompson has accused her of using extreme witchcraft to control her life she claims.  She claims Beyonce subjected her to “extreme exhaustion, magic spells of sexual molestation, loss of a man, job, theft of homes, large losses of money, extreme theft of intellectual properties, the murder of my pet kitten, magic spells on my lovers, and numerous broken relationships”.

Okay wait. I have never met a witch before, but legends say they are not to be messed with. While these accusations might sound little ridiculous to many Americans, it is one hell of a case in Africa.  Trying to get my head round it, if Beyonce is a serious witch as claimed, how did Ms Thompson break away from her spells?  Is this for publicity,  yes it is.  Will she win any case on this, you already know the answer.

 

When Jesus said he he will come again , I don’t think he had Ebelena Chukwu in mind.

Just a month ago the story of the bulletproof pastor spread all over the internet like cancer.  We’ve seen a pastor  trying to walk on water,  and another on who tried to  fly.  Now we have another pastor turning water to wine.  Where do these people come from? Ebelena Chukwu,  the general  overseer of “Jehovah the mightier than all prophetic church ” claims too have turned water in to wine and doubters are just Antichrist. from. The sadest part of all this is that his followers  actually  believe him. What are followers for?  I guess he doesn’t want to be outdone by other pastors.  I guess this church biz is lucrative.  Brother Jeros everywhere.

 

 

 

 Bye bye so not for legends they said,  well said.

In the Nigerian Music Industry we have too many legends, too many that we don’t even remember them these days. A lot of one hit legends  and social media legends. The you see the ‘I have here for so long’ legends. But Timaya is here.

Nigerian dancehall artiste,  Timaya,  in his recent interview with Sound City F.M said that 2face is the only Nigerian  artist worthy to call himself a legend.  I agree to this, but in my unbiased opinion,  I think D’banj and Psquare have done enough. Timaya said in the interview : in this part of the world,  many artistes when they get to 10 years, they start shouting ‘I’m a legend ‘, ‘legendry’.  To me the only person that can call himself a legend is 2face . Nice to now know that  he isn’t consumed by his ego. (we know he wants someone else to name him a legend) The guy doesn’t even consider himself a legend after 13 years of hit song. This is for all my 10 years legends.

 

Bride price, Last price!

I’m not a fan of money for Bride Price,  so it’s team Adichie all the way.  But I’m not a fan of Adichie so I don’t know how this works.Bride Price is an ancient African tradition practiced since the beginning of time.  It was originally  something valuable  given in an exchange  for a Bride. Well, something has to be given  in order to take.  But in recent  times, this thing given has now graduated to an awful amount of money which the groom dreads to fork out.

A popular Nigerian writer,  Chimamanda Adichie was recently asked about her stand on Bride Price.  She replied: “I’m not a fan of Bride price.  I think we should get rid of the whole idea of money in marriage,  it ruins things.  We are not selling anybody “. Admitting her parents only took 10kobo for her Bride Price.

Adichie has obviously  received criticisms on her comment. I think  she should be used to it by now. And I think  this is the first time in recent times Adichie  has actually made sense to me. But you and I know she is totally right, right? Money for Bride Price objectifies women. Money for Bride Price really needs to go. But you know what legends  say,  it depends on the side of the wall you are leaning on.

 

Ekechi Gerard

 

 

 

 

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