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Guyman’s diary : Episode 1: Young dumb and broke

 

Episode 1

 

Guy man got admitted into the university, young, fresh, enthusiastic and ready to explore. Guy man was smart, funny, lively with a lovable presence. So was he and so were many girls in the school but guy man wasn’t really into girls save for one girl who was into him.

They were not in love, they were just friends or at least that was what they told people.

But in their mind they knew better, they didn’t just want to force the pace or simply didn’t know how to go about it even if they wanted to. Nothing matters to a young man more than the presence of his crush, guy man was a young man and this was all that mattered.

They went to class together, home they headed together. On the other end of her phone calls was guy man. She was ever present on guy man’s call log and when she is visible, he is lost in the reverie of her presence.

Like most young students, guy man was broke and she didn’t mind. Yet, guy man made sacrifices for her and she didn’t mind either. Scarified his bills for her bills, his joy for her joy, and his time for her time. They were happy, cute, and inseparable. But they were also young naïve and stupid.

 

Time passed, at the other end of her calls wasn’t guy man alone anymore. Some other people have arrived at the party.  She now rations attention between guy man and the others; there is nothing wrong with that, she deserves a bigger circle. Guy man is not worried, he pretends not be jealous, he is a guy man, guy men are not jealous.

Truly, guy man wasn’t jealous, he was scared. For all the new people in her life, there is one who particularly possesses guy man’s soul with fear. The one she calls “a friend”.

He recognizes that word for he used to be just “a friend” too.  He knows that friends easily afford romantic privileges if they stay long enough.

Guy man complains about this friend, she gets upset, guy man drops it. His allotted time kept getting smaller and the attention thinner. Someone must be stealing the lion share. His sacrifices are no longer needed; she got it covered these days.

As a guy man, he knows another guy man has entered the picture. Two captains never sail a ship, guy men are seldom two in one life. Guy man devises an enterprise, employs her neighbor as confederates. In one week he receives the most sinister of feedback, guy man has nothing on the new guy. He is no student, he is not broke, he is not ugly, he has no visible vices and even guy man’s informants seem to love him.

 

Guy man was secretly wishing the new guy was a terrible person, he hoped the new guy would not be good for her and he counted on the universe to be fair for once. Even in the face of reality, guy man was hoping she would hold onto her college love for the sake of love.  He confronted her, she confirmed his fears. “What future do we have?” she asked. “You are still a student like me; can you really take care of me?” “What if we continue, how will this end?” “I am a lady and will probably get married in a few years while you are still trying to make ends meet”.  “We have to accept reality and move on, we had a beautiful thing and that’s as good as it can get”.

Those words drove a spear right through guy man’s heart.  Lost for words his eyes glistened, he left in a hurry before the tears he put in a great effort to contain completes an escape. Guy man cannot cry over a woman, or maybe not in public. It will be more shameful than the unfortunate event that forced the tears.

Guy man isolated himself in the agony of his heartbreak. Relentlessly torturing himself with the thought that all she said was true. The new guy has everything he can’t offer. Not because he can’t, but because it isn’t yet his time. He is working and commands a comfortable living. Guy man will eventually afford such liberties but time is the unfortunate price and that time she cannot afford.And so for now, it is an unfair fight and so guy man has already lost the battle before the war could start.

This truth oppressed him for its singular unfairness and cold truthfulness.

How a man would ignore an avalanche of  working-class ladies who match his class entreating for his attention just to force the hands of a helpless young man for the only thing that made him happy. If he was truly a man, he would have fancied his chance against men of similar financial standing with ladies of equal class. But the coward chose a fight where he is outrageously advantaged; disregarding the dignity of those around the flower he is plucking like an emperor. And poor guy man, on the receiving end of life’s harshest cruelty.  No one enters a fight he is not sure of winning. Not the devil, not the girl, not the new guy and definitely not guy man.

Guy man counted his loss and dusted his feet. Came back to life and drank with other guy men in celebration of the return of the lost sheep.They echoed the over clichéd “I told you so” but eventually reached a preposterous conclusion that girls are ungrateful vile insects. He now agrees that women should not be trusted without the protests he usually volunteered when the going was good. He decided that commitment wasn’t guy man’s thing and his new acquaintances will pay the price for his new credo.

Guy man was taught that men who live by the sword, usually meet their end through the sword. Guy man’s heart has already suffered a fatal sword injury; it is only fair he lives by inflicting similar injuries as an appropriate solatium. So he lived until he outlived the desire. He achieved no true happiness and the lost love of his life got her fair share of heartbreak or karma as guy man would have himself believe.

 

Guy man graduates from school, partakes in his legitimate share of life’s post-school struggles, gets a decent job and matures into a man. Along with school life, he ditches his indecent romantic life, abandons unfair hate for whoever broke his heart and becomes a rational positive adult.He isn’t really a player in the classical sense of it, he thinks to himself he needs a stable relationship that will lead to marriage and bliss.

 

Guy man is still handsome, funny and loveable as ever. But he has added a new weapon to his armoury to which he employs involuntarily in the capture of women. He is now rich and successful, a strong member of the league of complete and eligible young men. And as such, ladies flocked around him. Ladies of equal class and drive with matching physical and financial strengths. If ever he interests himself in testing the formidability of his elite manhood status, it is that singular quintessential scenario that these ladies so plentifully present. And there exist equal or even better-placed men to make the battle for their love a fair one.

But guy man isn’t interested in glamour or the attraction of his current social class. He preferred a quiet humble young girl. In fact, he met one already and he is currently just a friend to her and comfortable with just a friend for the time. He liked her smartness, her kindness, her humour and that electric smile. This might be love but he didn’t want to create pressure for his young undergraduate acquaintance. He played his friend role ruthlessly well. He bought her gifts, supported her school, gave her treats, and just gave her money just for nothing. He had the money and what are friends for if not to share happiness.

 

As time grew, they became closer and spent more time together. And somewhere in the campus, another guy man is wondering what he did to deserve a treatment like this from a girl he did nothing but love.

Guy man has become that friend who showed to push another poor guy man away.

Guy man understands that somewhere in town, a guy man is cursing his luck for being young and broke, but he doesn’t feel a shred of guilt.

He has become a perpetrator of same evil that shattered his heart in school.

He used to be on the receiving end but now he is the giver in chief.

Guy man has heard a lot of people say life isn’t fair but not a single protest to this.So we all agree, life is not just fair.

 

This unfair circle is a necessary evil in the creation of guy men.

You learn the hard way and make sure younger ones learn too.

It is a classic case of the statue and the pigeon.

The pigeon will continue to shit on the statue.

You just have to accept that some days you are the statue and some days you are the pigeon.

 

E.I

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